It's been awhile since I posted a blog and decided it was time I let you all know I am still alive and kicking.
So, I went to the movies this afternoon and saw "The Vow". It actually got me thinking about a lot of things. The movie is about a husband and wife who are involved in an auto accident resulting in the wife losing her memory of him as her husband. She could remember being engaged to someone else and so she reverted back to the person she was before she met him. She pretty much was totally different from the person he knew.
On the way home, Gregg and I talked about who we really are and where our identities really come from. For instance, I can't swim and am pretty much afraid of water....is it possible that under different circumstances and different relationships....I would be an exceptional swimmer and love the water??? What if one of the Osmonds with all their musical talent would have been adopted at birth by someone with no interest or gifts in music. Would their natural ability to sing have surfaced on it's own regardless of their environment or the way they had been raised? We all have God given talents and interests, but how much of who we are is actually determined by our environment, parents, and culture. What do I really love....and what have I been told I love? What has been predetermined and what has been learned? How much of what we do or say is what we really believe and how much is determined by expectations and influences of others?
Have you ever really thought about what you would be if you were free of all judgments, fears, and expectations of others?
We ate at the Texas Roadhouse yesterday, and halfway into our meal they cranked up the music and all of the waiters and waitresses came out and line danced to the song. I watched their faces. Some were embarrassed to have to do it. But others were enjoying every minute of it and doing it well. They were FREE. It made me smile inside to see people who were not in bondage to fear and embarrassment. They were not held captive by the thoughts of others or fear of failure, or insecurities in abundance.
Too often we are stopped from being FREE by the voices in our heads that tell us we are too old, or too fat, or too inferior, or too ____________. You fill in your own blank. It doesn't really matter. We all have those voices in our head. I guess the point of all this is that far too often, we let these voices control our actions and in doing so....lose our own FREEDOM in the process. Jesus came to set the captives free. He came to give us life and give it to us abundantly. In actuality...I wanted to jump up in that aisle and dance with them. I wanted to experience the exhileration of a freedom that didn't care what the people looking on thought!! Maybe they would see my joy and laugh along with me instead of at me. But, alas...I sat there, not even allowing myself to drop the peanut shells on the floor because it just wasn't right to do so. At least, that is what one of the voices in my head kept telling me. Curse these chains of bondage...these blasted voices in my head that condemn and control.
Like the old song says, "I've gotta be me...I've gotta be me! What else can I be...but me?" What I'm learning is, that as soon as I grab hold of my identity in Christ and realize what I was created to be....nothing will be able to stop me! It's coming....and if you see me line dancing in the aisle of a grocery store, or singing off key at the top of my voice...or even wearing plaids and stripes together..you will know that I've finally arrived. But if you think I've lost it or I'm stupid, or too old to be acting in such foolish ways....well, I really don't care.
Where the spirit of the Lord is.............there is freedom! In his sermon today, my pastor made a statement that I think we all should live by. You only need to be concerned about an audience of One! His voice is the only one you need to listen to! And seriously.......I think He is saying DANCE!