Am I Really a Mafia Gangster?????

I sometimes think there needs to be a reteaching of common sense again for our own protection. Let me explain. I enjoy writing my blogs and reading other blogs. It is an opportunity to express my views, my opinions, my lifestyle. I check my facebook often and enjoy the ability to have contact with all my "facebook friends", but I must admit that there are times when I don't think I really realize how many people might read what I've written. I believe we are definately leaving an impression of ourselves, a heartbeat of who or what we are and who or what we love on the pages of time for the world to view. Sometimes it may be accurate, but other times it might falsly represent us or be inaccurately interpreted. I view what I write somewhat like a journal...a place to express myself and what I am feeling or doing at any given time. If I write that my favorite music is Lawrence Welk style (God forbid) than the reader can assume that I like Lawrence Welk music, right? If I post pictures of myself...I can assume that people will look at them.
So I asked myself a question. If my facebook account was the only way anyone would ever really know anything at all about me....am I representing myself accurately and expressing who I really am? Would I give people reason to question my trustworthiness?? my character??? my beliefs???
I was watching Dr. Phil the other day, and he was saying how many workplaces actually use Facebook, My Space, and the such to learn more about applicant's that have applied for a job with their companies. Would my facebook pages make me a good candidate for a job? Would I be embarrased by anything I had posted? What would my pastor think? My boss? My parents? My in-laws? I know...it's just about fun, right? I guess I'm just saying that people will still take what I write and form some kind of opinion or thoughts about me. Maybe I should think for a moment, use common sense before I write...not everything I think, believe, or do was meant to be expressed or shared with the world.

Seven Days Without Laughter Makes One Weak

I can't imagine my life without humor. I am also amazed at how funny the world we live in really is. I'm especially amused at the wonderful sense of humor God has the older I get. I've tried to make a list of everyday situations that I find humorous. If you do not enjoy a good laugh, DO NOT do anything on the following list.

1. Sit in one of those carry-in-a-bag lawn chairs. They do not have stable arm rests to use as support, soooo how is anyone ever suppose to get out of them again?? Believe me...I tried. It was NOT a pretty sight. They cradle you like a beached whale sling. I had to call for recruits to hoist me out. By the way, thanks Taylor!

2. Put on pantyhose. Any woman who has tried to squeeze her belly and butt into a pair of these knows what I am talking about. You have to have a sense of humor and at least a couple of hours to try to get these on. The dancing, squirming, prodding, folding, stuffing and wiggling that goes on is worth a good laugh. But take my word for it....you don't want to have to go to the bathroom once you're stuffed into them or you'll NEVER get them back on in one of those little stalls!

3. Give grandchildren pony rides. I repeat....DO NOT try to do anything on all fours with a kid on your back.

4. Leave a dollar tip for your waitress. Although your generosity might make you all giggly, you'll discover that she does NOT have that great a sense of humor.

5. Look in the motel mirror as you're getting out of the bathtub. Why in the name of God do they put mirrors there? Does anyone look that good naked? You definately need a sense of humor for that...a blindfold doesn't hurt, either. Nuff said!

6. Have a mammogram. You have to find some humor in it. If putting on the stinking gown isn't enough, ironing your private parts into flat pancakes will do the trick.

7. A holiday sale. There is always something funny about a group of psychotic women, standing outside a locked door, waiting to claw and shove their way in for a free cookie or snowglobe. Take time to enjoy the fear in the door unlocker's eyes as you realize the one and only free snowglobe was just handed to the pushy woman in front of you! Yes, there was ONE woman in front of you. Pushy broad!

8. Pictures of yourself. Mouth opened, shoveling food into your mouth...bending over to pick up something, hair standing on end, unflattering clothing, you might as well laugh....your children certainly are :)

9. Forgetfulness. You head for the bathroom, but before you get halfway there you forgot why you were going....oh, well, by then it's too late!

10. A remote control fart machine. NEVER get your 8 year old grandson the only thing he ever wanted for his birthday. It will definately come back to haunt you :-)

Seriously, don't take life that way! Have a good heartfelt laugh at your own expense. You'll be ever so glad you did.

My Life's Story

I noticed that I hadn't written a blog since June...what does that say about me? Am I too busy...do I have nothing important to say...I know that just isn't true because I just reread some of my older blogs and believe me...I have plenty to say :)
I think that sometimes it's just really difficult to be that transparent with people. We care sooo much about what others think that we are afraid to show our vulnerable side. I've discovered that not everyone will like what you write...not everyone will appreciate or even "get" what you write...but maybe someone will know you or understand you just a little bit better by reading your blogs.
My life is a book...not always open...but full of tidbits of useful information to those who take the time to read it or even misread it.

My life is a story, a wide open book,
Peer into my pages and take a good look.
Some chapters are happy and others are sad.
They'll reveal alot of the life I have had.
Some pages are fragile, so handle with care.
Those chapters expose me and lay my life bare.
The good and the bad and the ugly are seen,
The times I was kind and the times I was mean.
Child or mother, and also a wife,
They are chapters and pages of my story's life.
If you choose to read me, you'll have to embrace,
The story unfolding, so give me some grace.
I look forward to reading all of your stories, too,
For that is the way I will get to know you.
And in reading each page, understanding will flow,
And our love for each other's life story will grow.

I appreciate that you find my thoughts, writings, and blogs worth your time. Thank you to all my readers. I love being entrusted with your friendship and your life's story, also.

I Am a Rock, I Am an Island

I've discovered the world of Facebook and find it very interesting and sometimes a little sad...It is so amazing that we can have the world at the tips of our fingertips and in a split second we can keep up on what our friends and aquaintances are doing at a moments notice. To be able to access people we don't get to see every day and to be able to post pictures and express ourselves to others in a very safe way is wonderful. The possibilities are endless. It can appear as if we have hundreds and thousands of "friends" when in actuallity, some of them barely even know us or care about us. Thus, comes the sad part. Even though we can learn very intimate, or deep things about a person, maybe even a truer self than they display in person...it is so "safe". We never have to see the person face to face...we can answer them if we choose to or ignore them if we want, and they don't even get their feelings hurt, because they don't know it. We can know they're feeling sad...yet we can't talk to them face to face to really get to know them or understand them. We can draw little smiley faces or little frown faces, but the recipient at the other end never really knows the extent of those simple drawings. We can type LOL...but know one gets to appreciate or enjoy the sound of that laughter. We are uniting ourselves with the whole universe, yet isolating ourselves away from life at the same time. We are trying to communicate without voices, ears, eyes, and touch. We are texting, (No human voices) in abbreviations that take seconds to send. There isn't much distinction between what I "text" to my lover or what I "text" to my enemy. We don't hear the words I love you and distinguish whether their voice is telling you it means "you're my friend", or "I love you like I love my computer or an ice cream cone, or even "I want to marry you." I miss reading the real message people are sending with their body language...their eyes...are they sincere or are they lying to you. Technology is a brilliant tool...but I'm afraid we are creating a generation of people who will become as the Simon and Garfunkel song says, "I am a rock...I am an island." I hope we don't forget how badly we need each other...not just in a little square box that sits on our desks...or in the little cellular tool we carry around in our pockets....but in a real face to face physical way. I think technology makes it so much easier....we don't have to become involved or have the inconvenience of others intruding on our "own" time. Sounds a little selfish and self-centered to me...You might even disagree with my philosophy....but it really doesn't matter...I can delete what you think in a touch of a button and continue to delight and revel in the intelligence and wisdom found within the ramblings of my own "blogging...texting...and facebooking." And a rock feels no pain.....and an island never cries......

I Am.....His!

My daughter Jill just posted an I Am poem for her college class and I thought her's was amazing. It inspired me to try my own.

I am a faithful, compassionate, child of the king.
I wonder why God has chosen to lavish upon me His unmerited favor.
I hear unwritten symphonies in the laughter of His children.
I see His unfinished masterpieces on the tablets of each human heart.
I want to appreciate the moments, shine like a beacon, and leave a hard to replace void when I'm gone.
I am a faithful, compassionate, child of the king.

I pretend to be worthy of His love and the love of others.
I feel fear at the prospect of unveiling the "Real Me" to anyone.
I touch my world warily, holding back involvement, not risking exposure.
I worry that I am unlovable.
I cry at the injustice of a crucified Jesus rejected and denied by a world that He sat free.
I am a faithful, compassionate, child of the king.

I understand that our days are but a breath in the scheme of eternity.
I say I will make my life count and have meaning.
I dream of the moment that He looks into my eyes and says, "Well done, my good and faithful child."
I hope that my family, friends, and co-workers will hear those words, too.
I am a faithful, compassionate, child of the king.

Laughter and Tears

Things that make me Laugh:

1. A good practical joke. (Nothing to do with tatoos, though.)
2. Sarcasm. (Gregg's, mine, or anyone else's)
3. Everybody Loves Raymond, but mostly his dad! (Pretty close to my real life)
4. Making someone else laugh. (My favorite)
5. Other peoples' phobias. (Screaming men and spiders really crack me up.)
6. Making up new words to songs that make them a little "naughty".
7. Colter Lemmon.
8. Little kids trying to be funny.
9. Swinging. (Sorry...The one with chains and a seat.)
10. The word weiner. (I know...I know)
11. A good groin shot. (Probably because I am not a man)
12. Looking at myself in a mirror. (You might as well laugh)
13. When my boss brings me a stack of work and says I need this done in an hour.
14. Beating someone better than me at a game.

Things that make me cry:

1. Funerals, weddings, and graduations (Anybody's, Really)
2. A good sermon.
3. Onions.
4. Trying to hold in the giggles at the movies or at church.
5. The smell of my own feet.
6. Being really, really angry.
7. Injustice.
8. Abortions
9. Jeanne
10. My children
11. Losing things.
12. Fear
13. Pounds. (Only on myself, though.)
14. A sad movie...A happy movie....A moving movie....A boring movie...

Family Dynamics

It is interesting to me how as your children grow up into adults with families of their own the whole dynamics of the term "family" changes. Let me explain. As a parent, my family is and will always be the circle of me, my spouse, and my children. As the children go off and get married and have children...my circle expands. My family now also includes their spouses and their children, (my grandchildren). Sometimes it even includes their spouse's extended family. They become my family, also. But, it seems I've also noticed a strange phenomenon. It's not really that strange, but whatever. My children's "family" circle becomes different. It becomes them, their spouse, and their children. Their own brothers and sisters are all still included in their family circle, also. But I've noticed that we, "their parents" become less and less a part of their family circle. "We" began to be excluded and they began to have "family" excursions without including us. Surprisingly, they no longer want to spend time with us. Hey! I know! It's weird, huh? Somehow...they no longer really see their parents as an essential part of their family.
As a parent, I guess it's difficult to understand why you some how have slipped from the pedestal you once stood on and have fallen in their eyes to the level of being somewhere between a pesky, annoying mosquito to a downright pain in their patooty! Now, may I state that as a parent, you never intend to become that! But somehow, amid their teenage years, your voice to them becomes as shrill as the scratching of fingernails across a blackboard and you begin to think that your questions are written on the ceiling the way they roll their eyes at you.
My brain realizes that this has become the way of family dynamics to this generation. It wasn't all that long ago that granny and gramps was essential to the family, and I'm sure Carol Brady and Marian Cunningham were always needed for crucial decision making in their children's lives and always a welcomed addition to Marcia and Ritchie's family outings.
Alas, this is no longer the case. Which brings me to the subject at hand.
As a parent, I wish I could take the higher road....I wish I had no feelings to express, which would make all of my children's life easier. But, I'm going to lay it out there. Sometimes it hurts! My brain understands....my heart hurts. My brain understands that my children and their families all want to go together on a summer outing. My heart says...why didn't they want and need us. Why does our role as parents never end but their role as our children ends the day they head to college?
It's a question that I'll ask God someday...and I'm sure He'll answer, "My children leave me out all the time, too. They don't seem to need or want me, either. They don't invite me along on their outings or to their homes, either. And heaven forbid, that they pay a price for Me. My heart understands this all too well. But, rest assured, I made the family dynamics, the family circle, that way on purpose. You see, a parent's heart is always bigger than their child's heart. It can take the pain. Pain helps the heart grow bigger and softer. It makes you vulnerable and real. That's a good thing. But I tell you the truth, my child, someday your child's heart will grow into a parent's heart. And when that happens, they'll understand, and they will have days that their heart will ache and hurt so bad they won't believe they can hardly stand it. But it will stretch their heart. And that in turn will stretch your heart somemore, also. In fact, somedays the pain will stretch your heart so big you will believe it will explode or break. But it won't, because I am the heart expert and making big, soft hearts is what I'm all about. So get use to it. And learn by looking at how you treat your own parents. Their hearts are the biggest and softest of all."